Notes From the Trail (Decemver 2006)

It has been rough for me lately because the holidays are near. The other day was Thanksgiving and it was very difficult not being with my family that day. It is great here but I am now through the honeymoon stage. All of the newness and excitement has died down and it has been tough. In the beginning I was raving about all of the great things in Europe now I can't help to think about the greatness of the United States. It is not a bad place to live. It is true that I don't feel the normal pressures of the American society but at times I feel like such an outsider in this place. My communication skills are great for someone that has only lived here for 2 months (give or take) and studied Spanish 10 years ago but, there is still a barrier. I would compare my vocabulary to that of a 6 year old. Like I said that is great considering the time I have been here but for a person that heavily relies on their communication skills it is tough not being able to thoroughly express themselves. I am sure I could make lots of Spanish friends if I could find the right words to say. That language barrier is tough. This entire experience is tough but I know I am so much stronger because of it. I have learned a tremendous amount about myself as well as others. I have also had some time to think about life overall and reevaluate some things. On a more positive note I am very happy that I have learned to submerge myself in fun again. I have been having a great time and doing lots of the things I only dreamed about doing. This has been an experience of a lifetime and I know I am very fortunate to have had this opportunity. I know lots of people don't even move away from their hometown let alone their country. I am glad I have taken this chance and decided to put my courage and strength to the test. I know this is a long blog and I hope that you find the time to read it. I wrote this to say thanks to everyone who has supported me. I also wrote this for myself because I know that I am going to have to read this when I am trying to adjust back to life in the United States. It will be important for me to reflect on my experiences here.